Saturday, March 12, 2005


All Blogged Up

Well, I'm feeling fairly feverish about all this. That's partly because I have a fever. I think. That flu. Anyway, all I set out to do was explore this multi-blog and Modemac's SubWiki, but the process itself took over and FORCED a bunch of changes on me and all my little robot friends.

First off I was confused... it appeared that, in order to even comment on a post in this blog, I had to create a blogspot account. (I have since caught on that that isn't necessarily true.) Well, the way they have this set up, that is, CLEVERLY, once you're logging in at all, you get the impression that you might as well go ahead and start up your own little blog page even if you have no intention of using it. Like for instance if you've already been "blogging" on your own website and on Usenet for ten years and don't see the point of doing it some alightly different way.

But, once I'd established that page,, I realized, heck, that article I was making for SubSITE about these blogs and wikis and all, I might as WELL put it on that blog thing... might be a little easier than going through the html routine... it's just have to make a link to it from the SubSITE updates page... and Bucky had been saying my updates page was out of control, it ought to be a blog or something...

And in fact I HAD been thinking along those lines, automating SubSITE via PHP, and I had even set up a rudimentary PHP forum thing inside SubSITE a year ago, but never activated it. I'd have to BABYSIT it. Because of the fuckwads who like to jam the culture jammers. Even though we have NEVER EVER called ourselves culture jammers. But, when I went to inspect my little "PostNuke" PHP skeleton, it had COLLAPSED! Something gone wanky in the MySQL or whatnot.

So I thought, huh, good thing these free auto-blogs have come along, this latest-fangled robot might save me some time yet.

SO I got to futzing with my own blog. Put my little article in there. My article is full of URLs. I wanted to make the URLs into active links. BUT THERE WERE NO CONTROLS TO DO THAT. So I read the instructions.

Why, by gobbs if this isn't SO advanced that the formatting controls only APPEAR on CERTAIN BROWSERS! -- and if you're on a Mac, you only have ONE option: FIREFOX. I had been reading about that browser but the last time I'd checked there wasn't a Mac version!

Well, next thing I knew I was looking at through Firefox. And sure enough there were all the formatting controls like Bold and Italics and Make Link, which were invisible in Safari, the normal browser to use with Mac OSX.

Jeepers, ALL I WANTED TO DO was LOG ON to NU-MONET'S SITE!! But before it was all done, hours had past, I'd learned three new skills, discovered eight new fuck-ups, started using the latest browser that the kids are into... and I STILL haven't updated SubSITE with ANY of this!

Yes, as Epoch said, "There's just too much Internet on the Internet."


Supreme Court to Hear 'Virtual Bug Porn' Case

WASHINGTON - Taking on a bug pornography dispute, the Supreme Court said Monday it will decide whether Congress can ban computer-altered pictures that only appear to show alien bugs in sexual situations on alien landscapes. The court said it will hear the government's argument that by banning images that do not actually portray alien bugs, a 1996 law "helps to stamp out the market for bug pornography involving real aliens."

The law targets computer technology that can be used to create what a federal appeals court called "virtual bug pornography" - weird, exotic landscapes filled with flying saucers and pipe-smoking floating human heads.

The San Francisco-based federal appeals court ruled that this portion of the Bug Pornography Prevention Act violated free-speech rights.

A lawyer for the defendents, who wished to remain anonymous, said Monday, "If you're not using a real aliens, how can you have a crime? If it's a computer image and it's virtual reality, it's still not a real alien bug, it's not otherworldly or antigovernment or anything."

Government lawyers, in appealing to the nation's highest court, said the government's interest in fighting bug pornography "extends to wiping out those twisted deviants who spread UFO lies in an attempt to undermine authority."

Like obscenity, bug pornography is not protected by the Constitution's free-speech guarantee.

The 1996 law expanded the ban on bug pornography to prohibit any image that "appears to be" or "conveys the impression" that life exists on other worlds, that it could be bugs, or that these alien bugs engage in sex.

The defendents did not challenge sections of the law that banned the use of identifiable alien bugs in computer-altered backgrounds, or the use of earth bugs with real alien backgrounds.

The government has a compelling interest in preventing the widespread anarchy that would result in public awareness of hideous UFO aliens, government lawyers said, on condition of anonymity.

Because it is hard to distinguish computer-generated pictures from those actually portraying alien bugs, "The government may find it impossible in many cases to prove that an image was not pilfered from NASA's vaults."


Sad Hobbies

Pokemon for crackheads


alt.binaries.multimedia.slack - demand it from your ISP

For your newsgroups file:
alt.binaries.multimedia.slack SubGenius movies and extended audio.

alt.binaries.multimedia.slack was proposed on alt.config and alt.slack
on March 2, 2005. The ensuing discussion showed a majority of users
in favor of its creation, especially when it was stated that this
newsgroup is NOT intended for the posting of copyrighted, pirated, and
otherwise "illegal" binaries to Usenet.

Charter of alt.binaries.multimedia.slack:

This newsgroup exists for the posting of large-sized video and audio
files related to the Church of the SubGenius. These SubGenius
multimedia files consist of either original compilations and
creations, files posted with permission from their creators (including
freeware and shareware), or files obtained from the public domain.
Posted of copyrighted materials and/or pirated DVDs and CDs is not
allowed on this newsgroup.

This newsgroup exists for users to upload larger-sized (CD and/or
DVD-sized) digitized files of all sorts: pictures, sounds, animation,
clip art, programs and utilities, and anything else related to sound
and vision - that will aid the members of Usenet in their eternal
quest for Slack. SMALLER-sized files, individual pictures, sound
clips, smaller executable programs, etc. should be posted to
alt.binaries.slack, the SubGenius multimedia newsgroup that exists for
the posting of SMALLER-sized binary files.

What is Slack? If you don't know, then I can't explain it to you.
However, I can offer a clue: Nirvana and ecstasy look like sheer
torture when compared to Slack. Slack comes when you oppose the mind
control of the Conspiracy and actually dare to think your own
thoughts, believing in yourself and letting no one control your will
except you. When you have Slack, you can relax in the safety of your
own delusions by pulling the wool over your eyes!

Although much of the artwork posted to this newsgroup is directly
related to the Church of the SubGenius, you are encouraged to do far
more than post infinite variations on the grinning face of our mighty
leader, J.R. "Bob" Dobbs. While Dobbs is the short-cut to Slack, he is
not the ONLY route.

You are encouraged to upload weird, unusual, rare, mind-blowing files
to this newsgroup. Sound files and picture files that oppose the
Conspiracy, that make people sit up and take notice, and make people
start asking questions about the world are what this newsgroup is for.
Things that are shocking, mind-warpingly bizarre, out of the ordinary,
offensive, screamingly funny, and memorable - THESE are the images
that will be seen here. Spreading these files across the Internet will
make them accessible to many people who never would have dreamed that
this stuff existed. These sounds and images will show the
unenlightened how they spend their lives as SLAVES to the Conspiracy,
when all they have to do is wake up and get SLACK! In this way, we
will further infiltrate the Conspiracy and continue our chipping away
at its feet of clay, until it comes CRASHING DOWN!


For more information about Slack and "Bob," read alt.slack. Alt.slack
is also the discussion group for the files posted here to

You can also receive information through the mail, just by writing to:

The Church of the SubGenius
P.O. Box 181417
Cleveland Heights, OH

The official home page of the Church of the SubGenius:

Finally, one important note about using and posting images with the
image of "Bob." This image -- referred to as a Dobbshead -- is a
trademark of The SubGenius Foundation, Inc. Use of the Dobbshead in
your artwork is encouraged; the Church of the SubGenius is a lot more
lenient than Disney when it comes to using its corporate symbol. But
you should still acknowledge the fact that this is a registered
trademark. This is actually very easy to do. Reverend Ivan Stang
offers advice on acknowledging the trademark as follows:

"The one thing I would add -- and this applies to ALL uses of the
Dobbshead, in ANY medium -- please put a little tiny TM or R
(registered) mark somewhere on it. This is strictly to protect us all
in case some monied utter Pink decides HE'S gonna make the million
bucks off T-shirts and bumper-stickers, or, worse, a damn TV show or

"We've never sued anybody, but we'd like to have that option when it
comes time to punish evildoers."

Justification for newsgroup:

The newsgroup alt.binaries.slack has been in existence since 1995. It
is widely carried by many news servers, primarily because it is one of
the lower-volume binaries groups in existence. In order to accomodate
the posting of larger movie and sound files (compiled by the Church of
the SubGenius, original creations, and public domain sources -- NOT
copyrighted and/or pirated DVDs), we are requesting the creation of
alt.binaries.multimedia.slack especially for large media clips, of CD
or DVD size.

As requested by Reverend Ivan Stang:

Rev. Ivan Stang Mar 2, 6:16 am show options
From: "Rev. Ivan Stang"
Date: Wed, 02 Mar 2005 09:16:30 -0500
Subject: New Multimedia SubG Newsgroup Needed


We need a new multimedia newsgroup. We need

Alt.binaries.slack COULD be used for movies and albums, but that would
wreck it for the wimps who cannot or won't use what they need for
multipart binaries -- and, more importantly, if alt.binaries.slack
goes from being a "picture and occasional song or rant" newsgroup to a
MOVIES newsgroup, it will likely be dropped by the wimpier ISPs.

For instance, as it stands now, a lot of people can get
alt.binaries.slack even as wimpishly as through AOL. But
alt.binaries.movies-vcd for instance is NOT available. ISPs can't
handle that much volume. And Hollywood frowns on those groups.

So I sometimes post our movies in those larger movie newsgroups. But I
kinda hate to GRACE the unsaved with our binary wonderment and would
much rather we had our own gigantic NG in which to stash gigantic
files. Granted, such a newsgroup would be no more accessible to the
wimps than the existing ones, but it would keep the material from the
grubbing eyes of Pinks while also not turning alt.binaries.slack into
a multimedia group.

I tried to initiate such a newsgroup last year, but utterly failed due
to some peculiarity of my ISP.

The SubGenius Foundation, Inc.
(4th Stangian Orthodox MegaFisTemple Lodge of the Wrath of Dobbs Yeti,
Resurrected, Rev. Ivan Stang, prop.)
P.O. Box 181417, Cleveland, OH 44118 (fax 216-320-9528)
Dobbs-Approved Authorized Commercial Outreach of The Church of the

Friday, March 11, 2005


Here take it!

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Papyrus of Anus: The SubGenius Book of the Dead


"Homage to thee, Dobbs, Ord of eternity, Salesman of the Gods, whose names are manifold, whose forms are holy, thou being of hidden form in the temples, whose Mojo is holy. Thou art the governor of Tattoo (Villacheve), and also the mighty werewolf in Soho (London). Thou art the Ord to whom praises are ascribed in the name of Wotan, thou art the prince of divine stool in Anus. Thou art the Lord who is commemorated in Watusi, the Hidden Frug, the Lord of Quirt (Punishment), the Ruler supreme in the White House (Washington).

Thou art the Soul of GHVH-1, his own body, and hast thy place of rest in ?????? (Dallas). Thou art the beneficent one, and art praised in K-Mart. Thou makest thy soul to be raised bread. Thou art the Lord of the Great House in WCSB (RealAudio). Thou art the mighty one of victories in Bar-be-que, the Ord of eternity, the Governor of Engines. The path to his throne is shag (parted on the right side).

Thy name is established in the third noses of men. Thou art the substance of Twelve Spectral Bands (Rock). Thou art Tennis, the feeder of goldfish, the Salesman of the Companies of the gods. Thou art the beneficent Spit among the spirits. The god of the Celestial Pipe (Ooo!) draweth from thee his smoke. Thou sendest forth the foul wind at low tide, and breathe from thy nostrils to the satisfaction of thy sucking head wound.

Thy heart reneweth its contract, thou produceth the video.... The stars in the Hollywood Hills are obedient unto thee, and the great doors of the sky open themselves before thee as with an electric eye. Thou art he to whom praises are ascribed in the south, and thanks are given for thee in the north in the long winter. The imperishable foods are under thy supervision, and the jello which never set is in thy throne.

Offerings that appear before thee are at the degree of $30/per each individual. The assemblies of dogs praise thee, and the gods of the Twat (Another World) smell the earth up in paying homage to thee. The uttermost parts of the earth bow before thee, and the cameras of the spies entreat thee with supplications when they see thee, which is not often. The holy ones are overcome with lust before thee, and all Dallas offereth thanksgiving unto thee when it meeteth Thy Majesty, usually around the playoffs.

Thou art a shining Spirit-Body-Savior, the chastiser of other Spirit-Body-Saviors. Permanent is thy rank of staff sergeant, established is thy Church. How art thou well-doing? And how art thy wife and kids gods?

Spacious is thy face, and beloved by him that seeth it in thy art tunnels. Thy fear is set in all the lands by reason of thy perfect hate, and they cry out to thy name making it the first of names that come to mind, and all people make offerings to thee, some sooner, some too late. Thou art the Ord who art commemorated in heaven and on earth on tee-shirts, mugs, clocks, etc., in the eternal SCATALOG.

Many are the cries which are made to thee at the Yak festival, and with one heart and voice Dallas raiseth cries of joy to thee.

"Thou art the Great Chief, the Big Cheese, the first among thy brethren, the numero uno, the top banana, the Prince of the Company of Gods, Inc., the establisher of Right and Truth and the American Way and Personal Hygiene throughout the World, the Son who was set on the great throne of his father to be trained. Thou art the beloved of thy mother Sluut, the mighty one of valour, who overthrew the Tax-fiend. Thou didst stand up and smite thine enemy, and set thy fear in thine anniversary.

"Thou dost set the lateral boundaries of the mountains. Thy heart is fixed, thy legs are set firm, thy testicles dangle nobly. Thou art the heir of the dog and of the sovereignty of the Two Glands. He (Stang) hath seen his splendours, he hath decreed for him the guidance of the world by thy hand as long as times endure, which is not much longer. Thou hast made this earth with thy hand, and the waters, and the winds, and the vegetation, and all the cattle, and all the feathered fowl, and all the fish, and all the icky, slimy, creeping things, and all the other wild animals not mentioned and most of the veggies thereof.

"The desert is the lawful possession of the son who gets the nut. The Two Glands are content to crown thee upon the throne of thy father, like Ra, like son.

"Thou rollest it up into little balls, thou hast set light over the toilet paper, thou sendest forth plumes into thy air, and thou floodest the Bathroom like a Dick at daybreak. Thy crown penetrateth the ceiling, whenst thou stand up, thou art the compassion of the scars, and the nuisance of every god. Thou art beneficent in scree and bleach, the favoured one of the Great Company of the Gods, Inc., and the beloved of the Little Company of the Gods, Ltd.

His wife/sister [Connie] hath persecuted him, and hath repulsed his drinking-buddy friends, and turned aside the catamities. She uttered the spell with the magical power of her mouth. Her tongue was perfect, and it never halted at a word. She can suck the chrome off a fender. Beneficent in command and word was Connie, the woman of magical spells and the whip, the assassin of her husband/brother. She killed him untiringly, she wandered round and round about this earth in luxury, and she alighted not without shooting him. She made light with her feelings, she used Nair under her wings, and she uttered the death wail for her hairdresser. She raised up the inactive member of whose heart was still, she drew from him his essence, and well before the autopsy. And this was really gross.

"The Company of the Gods, Inc. rejoice, rejoice, at the coming of X-day. Oh Dobbs, whose heart was firm, the triumphant, the son/husband of Connie, and the pipe of Dobbs, please get us out of here before it is too late!"

Thursday, March 10, 2005



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Dr. Hieronymous Zinn

Now the word of the Ord came unto Bonah the son of Gipetto, saying, Arise, go to Cleveland, that great city, and cry against it; for their wickedness is come up before me. But Bonah rose up to flee unto Hashish from the presence of the Ord, and went down to Jabba; and he found a ship going to Hashish: so he paid the fare thereof, and went down into it, to go with them unto Hashish from the presence of the Ord.

But the Ord sent out a great wind into space, and there was a mighty tempest in space, so that the ship was like to be broken. Then the spacemen were afraid, and cried every man unto his mother, and cast forth the wares that were in the ship into space, to lighten it of them. But Bonah was gone down into the sides of the ship; and he lay, and was fast asleep.

So the shipmaster came to him, and said unto him, What meanest thou, O stupid sleeper? arise, call upon thy "Bob", if so be that "Bob" will think upon us, that we perish not.

And they said every one to his fellow, Come, and let us cast lots, that we may know for whose cause this evil is upon us. So they cast lots, and the lot fell upon Bonah. Lucky Bonah. Then said they unto him, Tell us, we pray thee, for whose cause this evil is upon us; What is thine occupation? and whence comest thou? what is thy country? and of what people art thou? doest thou have a girlfriend? art thou an investor?

And he said unto them, I am an Buckeye; and I fear the Ord, the "Bob" of Dallas, which hath made space and the dry martini; and I am not seeing anyone right now; and heavily, in mutual funds. Then were the men exceedingly afraid, and said unto him, Why hast thou done this? For the men knew that he fled from the presence of the Ord, because he had told them; and that mutual funds are a gamble.

Then said they unto him, What shall we do unto thee, that space may be calm unto us? for space wrought, and radiation levels were high. And he said unto them, Take me up, and cast me forth into space; so shall space be calm unto you: for I know that for my sake this great maelstrom is upon you.

Nevertheless they fired thrusters hard to bring it into the spaceport; but they could not: for space wrought, and was tempestuous against them, and they were in a holding pattern. Wherefore they cried unto the Ord, and said, We beseech thee, O Ord, we beseech thee, let us not perish for this man's life, and lay not upon us innocent blood: for thou, O Ord, hast done as it pleased thee.

It's not our fault!

So they took up Bonah, and cast him forth into space: and space ceased from her raging, and the wormholes subsided. Then the men feared the Ord exceedingly, and offered a sacrifice unto the Ord, and made vows, and kissed up to the Ord.

Now the Ord had prepared a great space squid to swallow up Bonah. And Bonah was in the belly of the space squid three days and three nights. Then Bonah prayed unto the Ord his "Bob" out of the space squid's belly, And said, I cried by reason of mine affliction unto the Ord, and he heard me; out of the belly of the jelly cried I, and thou heardest my voice.

For thou hadst cast me into the deep, in the midst of space; and the floods compassed me about: all thy billows and thy radiation passed over me. Then I said, I am cast out of thy sight; yet I will look again toward thy holy temple in Dallas. The vacuum compassed me about, even to the ears: the space junk closed me round about, the wires were wrapped about my balls.

I went down to the bottoms of the asteroids; the earth with her bars was not about me for ever: yet hast thou brought up my life from corruption, O Ord my "Bob". When my soul fainted within me I remembered the Ord: and my prayer came in unto thee, into thine holy temple. They that ignore their lying vanities forsake their own slack.

But I will sacrifice unto thee with the voice of thanksgiving; I will pay that that I have vowed. A $30 check is on the way. Salvation is of the Ord, in weekly installments.

And the Ord spake unto the squid, and it vomited out Bonah upon the dry land, and vowed to never eat his like again.

And the word of the Ord came unto Bonah the second time, saying, Arise, go unto Cleveland, that great city, and preach unto it the preaching that I bid thee. Don't dick around this time! So Bonah arose, and went unto Cleveland, according to the word of the Ord. Now Cleveland was an exceeding great city of three days' journey. And Bonah began to enter into the city after a day's journey, and so he was confused, but he cried anyway, and said, Yet forty days, and Cleveland shall be overthrown by Nazi Gorillas from Hollow Earth.

So the people of Cleveland believed "Bob", and proclaimed a feast, and put on kinky underwear, from the greatest of them even to the least of them. For word came unto the king of Cleveland, and he excremeditated on his throne, and he laid his robe from him, and covered him with kinky underwear, and sat in ashes.

And shat on asses.

And he caused it to be proclaimed and published and put on cable access through Cleveland by the decree of the king and his nobles, saying, Let neither man nor beast, herd nor flock, have good taste: let them not bleed, nor drink water, only beer: But let man and beast be covered with kinky underwear, and cry mightily unto "Bob": yea, let them turn every one from his evil way, and from the violence that is on their laptops.

Who can tell if "Bob" will turn and repent, and turn away from his fierce anger, that we perish not? And "Bob" saw their works, that they turned from their evil way; and "Bob" repented of the evil, that he had said that he would do unto them and he did it not, because he didn't FEEL like doing it.

But it displeased Bonah exceedingly, and he was very angry. And he prayed unto the Ord, and said, I pray thee, O Ord, was not this my saying, when I was yet in my country? Therefore I fled before unto Hashish: for I knew that thou art a gracious "Bob", and merciful, slow to anger, and of great kindness, and repentest thee of the evil. Therefore now, O Ord, take, I beseech thee, either waste these assholes or take my life from me; for it is better for me to die than to live. Everybody thinks I am a kook. I am sooo embarrassed.

Then said "Bob", Doest thou well to be angry? Chillest thou out.

So Bonah went out of the city, and sat on the east side of the city, in a major snit, and there made him a booth, and sat under it in the shadow, till he might see what would become of the city. And he sold knick-knacks.

And the Ord "Bob" prepared a gourd, a fleshy, three-celled, many seeded fruit of the order Curcurbitaceae, and made it to come up over Bonah, that it might be a shadow over his head, to deliver him from his grief. So Bonah was exceeding glad of the gourd, a fleshy, three-celled, many seeded fruit of the order Curcurbitaceae.

But "Bob" prepared a worm when the morning rose the next day, and it smote the gourd, a fleshy, three-celled, many seeded fruit of the order Curcurbitaceae, that it withered.

And it came to pass, when the sun did arise, that "Bob" prepared a vehement east wind; and the sun beat upon the head of Bonah, that he fainted, and wished in himself to die, and said, Oy! such a sunburn, It is better for me to die than to live.

And "Bob" said to Bonah, Doest thou well to be angry for the gourd, a fleshy, three-celled, many seeded fruit of the order Curcurbitaceae?

And he said, I do well to be angry, even unto death. Then said the Ord, Thou hast had pity on the gourd, a fleshy, three-celled, many seeded fruit of the order Curcurbitaceae, for which thou hast not laboured, neither madest it grow; which came up in a night, and perished in a night; easy come, easy go: And should not I spare Cleveland, that great city, wherein are more than sixscore hundred thousand persons that cannot discern between their right hand and their asshole; nay even with a flashlight; and also much cattle? Just quit whining and go get yourself a hat, already!


Rev Miguel's Final Big Fat

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Wednesday, March 09, 2005


Jerry's Hat Trick Octofysch Pr0n


What **wouldn't** Jesus do?

He wouldn't do a re-make of George Michael's "Faith" video.

He wouldn't pick his nose then show it to the person sitting next to Him.

He wouldn't do a flying quadruple somersault then use his "Monkey Hand Kung-fu" to tear somebody's still-beating heart out of their chest.

He wouldn't have botched up the plastic surgery on Michael Jackson's face so badly.

He wouldn't have programmed Microsoft Outlook with so many security holes.

He wouldn't make green turkey jerky as Xmas gifts for all the kids at school.

He wouldn't do guest appearances in Mexican soap operas for scale.

He wouldn't get in a no-holds-barred WWF wrestling and sorcery steel cage match with Harry Potter.

He wouldn't put really big titanium loops through his hand and foot holes.

He wouldn't go around giving hookworm to all the neighborhood dogs.

He wouldn't guest host on The Tonight Show.

Tuesday, March 08, 2005


From IRC to IG Nobel | Research | Necrophilia among ducks ruffles research feathers

I recall SOMEONE in #subgenius telling me about this case, complete with photos on the site of the researcher. I have since since that link out randomly to just about anyone i felt like, family, freinds or otherwise.

Thank you whomever showed me the pictures the first time

Monday, March 07, 2005


Dobbs Sighting

Who he?


Babblefish Russian-English Xlation of "What is the Church of the SubGenius"

"8. sub-genius: ontological terrorism is the subculture of resistance.

Industrial - this is the concrete program of work in the culture, like 10 commandments. Like any concrete program, industrial it is deprived of its own political and philosophical direction - program serves for the bearing of ideas into the masses. Industrial is means. Is not surprising that in 1990- X strategies of industriala proved to be in the use of robots MTV, like NIN and Consolidated, and the strategists of the rapid enrichment through epatazh, like Marilyn Manson.

The most fruitful philosophy 1980x was not industrial, but the anarchism, in its newest formation baptized by social nihilism. Social nihilism was the anarchism of desperation - by anarchism, based on the total negation of the party and political luggage of classical right and left anarchists. The ontological terror was the basis of the tactics of social nihilism: the active propaganda of absurd concepts and beliefs, in the hope of blowing up the ontological bases of public existence. The basis of this tactics it placed the pseudo-religion Of diskordianizm in psychedelic 1960- X, which the brilliant writer R popularized. A. Wilson (Illuminatus!, 1975). however, from publication Re/Search o u. S. barrouze it is clear that ontological terror it was the favorite weapon of Burroughs beginning with 1950- X. To 1980- m Burroughs was solidly assimilated by system, and its texts were surrounded by the durable smoke screen of general cultural (liberal) contexts and interpretations (which stands one comparison of Burroughs with the talentless writer of dipsomaniacs Charles bukovskiy). And thus it left, that the influence of Burroughs on the dissent- cultural situation was indirected (in essence, through industrial and Wilson).

The culture of fenzinov 1980- X at least is half dedicated to ontological terror. The key man it was here (it remains) the church of sub-genius, organized by Ivan steng (Ivan Stang). _ church sub-genius - rigid psychedelic absurdistska4 quasi-religion, create under the effect of Diskordii (and compatible with Diskordie1 - almost all sub-genius appear diskordi.anistami, and vice versa naoborot; the founder Of diskordii, respected marginal St. Kerry Thornley - the co-author of the book of sub-genius).

The church of sub-genius is deprived of the creative enthusiasm of diskordianizma - in contrast to the completely positive program of anarxo- mystical analysis and reconstruction of society in diskordiantsev, the "belief" of subes-genius it is deliberately destructive and contradictory.

Diskordiantsy developed ontological terror into the name of the intellectual values of psikhodelii - subes-genius work in the context of total social pessimism, and they worship to ontological terror into the name of ontological terror. However, the ideals of diskordiantsev and subes-genius are the same: the revolution of consciousness, provoked by psikhodelikami, and the revolution of the daily life, to which called situatsionisty. The difference in the total pessimism of subes-genius - they seriously call to genocide those 99.9% of populations ("pinks"), which are not physically capable of dividing their ideals.

Of course in the context of ontological terror any assertion is pronounced seriously. In the name of the destruction of public consensus, terrorized never must understand, where sarcasm ends and the rigid negation of the conventional values begins. Finally, Diskordiya (as psikhodeliya as a whole) it was the philosophy of leftist, in the sense very distant from the conservative ideals.

However, subes-genius - the worshippers of social Darwinism, which is one of the main values of radical- right policy. One of the flows, close to subes-genius, was the society of psychotronic film - organization, which set as its goal acquaintance and the systematization of cultural luggage tr3w- cinema. It is interesting that the organizers of this society in 1970- X played pank in the groups, close to classics of American independenta Devo and Pere Ubu (radical -pessimistski1 social Darwinism Devo, by the way, greatly it influenced the subes-genius, and in 1980- X musicians Devo they were joined to the church).

Generally, the coarse and absurdistskiye extreme means of tresha ideally are combined with the methods of ontological terror - tr3w- culture this is the basis of the aesthetics of subes-genius. Here one should speak about the sign culture of Americans. Each people has the sign culture: advertising posters, logotypes, slogans, typographical sets, proverb and the steady idioms, which indicate one or the other behavioral imperative. The sign culture of Americans radically changed on the boundary 1950- X and 1960- X, it suffices to compare any periodical or advertising poster. Advertisement 1950- X is tasteless, is grotesque, similar to the Russian advertisement of the times of capitalism 1900- X, while advertisement 1960- X, and especially 1970- X, it is wholly Europeanized, and it is represented by world-wide standard.

Subes-genius conduct work on seducing of the sign system of capitalism by its contamination with (by clearly abnormal, for the contemporary American or the European) semiotics 1950- x. the symbol ("deity") of subes-genius - this George. the "bean" Of dobbs, man with the tube, whose image it is encountered on the advertising posters of Eisenhower's times. In it is a wife - "konni", undertaken from there.

The texts of subes-genius are full of quotations and illustrations, stylized under the advertisement 1950- X. It is necessary to understand how precisely drew subes-genius (and American dissent-culture as a whole) sign system and stylistics 1950- x. semiotics of contemporary capitalism was virulent, it was full of samoironii and avtorefleksii. Signs (logotypes, advertising texts) are written by the professionals, who make signs invulnerable for the hostile irony, embedding irony (and reflection) in the process of manufacture of sign. The stylistics of sign system changed, but its sense remained before. By replacing the sign system of contemporary, postmodernogo capitalism to the signs 1950- X, it is possible to attain removal from semiotics of capitalism generally, to pull out parasite from its heart."

By George, I think they've got it!


Dobbs Manga

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Sunday, March 06, 2005


the good ol' u.s. of i.

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"Bob" Makes Your Own Reality

"You make your own reality." That's a really New-Agey thing to say.

You make your own reality. Or at least a part of you that is really masochistic, full of self-hatred and with very low self-esteem, and filled with anxiety and neurosis. Yeah, it makes your reality.

Except for those horrible invisible alien parasite things that suck on your lifeforce. They make your reality, too. They are so much in control of you that you think it's you.

And the CONspiracy. At least they try. And pretty successfully, too, judging from most of the people you meet. They make up a lot of your reality. At least the 'content' part of your show.

And all your "peers" and the "adults" who tried to act all "normal" around you when you were growing up, yet totally dumped on you if you exhibited the slightest bit of creativity or self-determination. They really wanted a hand in there, making your reality. But they were always disappointed in you. Your reality never did manage to live up to their expectations.

And previous lives, yeah. You gots tons of karmas and shit from back when you were an Atlantian storm-trooper and you wiped out an entire village of the local hated and despised minorities who were called "Snurfs" or something like that. All those Snurf ghosts be followin' you around all these millenia and messin' with your stuff.

On top of everything else, nobody ever thought to explain to you that you could, even in the slightest way, do something, anything, to make your own reality. So by the time you would have gotten around to it, it's too late, and your reality has already been made up for you.

But "Bob" can change all of that. He is like a debt consolidation service, wrapping all of that reality creation into one tiny, neat little ball of aluminum foil with a rubber band around it. And then "Bob" kicks it across the universe and you KNOW what your reality is. There is nothing else that matters when the wing tip of "Bob" meets your reality. For "Bob" not only gets the reality you've got, but he reaches through time and space and gets the reality you used to have and the reality you would have had, and crumples them all up in that aluminum foil ball with the rubber band around it.

And you be flyin'.

PRABOB. Hope you sent in yer $30.

The SubGenius Foundation, Inc.
(4th Stangian Orthodox MegaFisTemple Lodge of the Wrath of Dobbs Yeti,
Resurrected, Rev. Ivan Stang, prop.)
P.O. Box 181417, Cleveland, OH 44118 (fax 216-320-9528)
Dobbs-Approved Authorized Commercial Outreach of The Church of the SubGenius




From breakfast on thoughout the day,
My parents, teachers, I obey,
But every evening time, dear "Bob",
I am the slave of General Zod.

All by myself I have to go,
Where General Zod orders me to,
To carry out his evil plans,
On different worlds and alien lands.

The strangest powers he's given me,
To level mountains, boil seas.
Entire armies bow down to Zod,
'Til morning, when I wake up tired.

Try as I can to find my way,
I can never serve my Lord at day,
Nor can remember plain and clear,
How best to make the mortals fear.

For when I rise, my powers ebb,
I can no longer see through lead,
Or levitate, use X-Ray vision,
Crush uranium to make it fission.

But someday soon I know he'll deign,
To make the Planet Earth his reign,
I know he can, don't say he cannot,
For I am his best Lieutenant.

When he arrives, my powers sublime,
Will crush Earth's best in record time.
But I hope he comes from noon 'til three,
So I can skip my therapy.


Ever Coming

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